He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
