google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Randomize
