Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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