Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
