I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
