After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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