Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
