Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Are we still banned from the library?
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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