Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
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