We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
