Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
