I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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