Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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