So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
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