I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
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