if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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