I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
I wish you could order shots online.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Randomize
