Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
His hands were made for my vagina.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize