i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Randomize