another moral hangover. fuck.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
