I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
