that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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