The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
The convent might be a nice break from real life
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