I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
