i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
