Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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