he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Randomize
