only you would photoshop your dick
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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