Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
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