I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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