At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
