We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I'm like, not good at living.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Randomize
