I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Randomize
