he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Randomize
