Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize
