Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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