They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
