i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Randomize
