And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize
