her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
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