I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
