i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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