Im at strip club and am horny
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
