We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
