Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
