you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
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