I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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