But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
God, you're like boner-b-gone
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
