The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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