That's when you crack a 10am beer
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
